Friday, February 18, 2011

The Bloody River

 
Before anything; know that you do not need the story of how a person was saved to realize that something has changed in his life. You absolutely do NOT need a testimony; ‘cause all you have to do is to open your eyes, and take a good look at him. The Bible says you will know a person by his fruits. A good tree cannot bear bad fruits and vice versa. And it won’t take anything to realize if a tree is good or bad  (if you believe the Bible that is…). That is the only way you’ll know if anything at all is really true.

This entry is long, grueling, beyond uncanny and painstakingly boring. You need not read all of this at all. But it’s there for my happiness and my closure on certain matters. It’s the very reason why this blog was created, the essence of it all; that someday I might go about and write what goes through my head. And it did take some time to get over it, but I did, and here it is: My thoughts in a thought...

In my most demented times, I wonder at the marvel; of how I was introduced to Christ. Not as just a goody do good person, but as a God; my God, as my savior, as my father, brother and friend… Though, the only thing that stood in my way was my foolhardy intellect. I faintly remember the first few stories I’ve heard about Him ‘back in the days’, those stories about a cool Dude walking on water, about those ‘Be still’ stories, and my! Water into wine! About Jonah and the fish, about David, Noah and the Ark. Stories that was fascinating to me as a child. I guess we all begin the same way; hear these as just ‘stories’ and around 20 years later (or way less), if you allow it, these stories will become a cherished history… Your history. Then it becomes all about the Kingdom you’ve just entered, all of its hosts applauding your entry; a Kingdom with a King who came to you disguised, who so dolefully gave away His precious life for your idiocy and paid the full price for your ingress; such and such in a huge calamitous divine collision. Know that He wants to incur an endearing beautiful exchange with you. All you’ve got to do is, for once; put away that intellect of yours, and open your hearts to believe. The rest is sure to follow.

Thursday, August 12, 2010

The Cocksure Fantasy



Hey the haughty river, flowing unrecognized
Arrogance runs your ripples
Exacerbation your motive, temper the sword
And surely, it cuts too deep
Too deep to salve

You scathe everyone, nasty foulness
The tight wounds you conceive
You sew its threads with care, yet you rip it apart
Pain, Pain and Pain again…
None in your path, all equal in your selfish eyes

Like a bloody wizard in winter,
You foretell your deceitful future
Anger and disconcert in it all...
You sin like there's no God
Your stench, your vomit,
your soils, all a curse

You bastard, you the perfect hypocrite…
You mongrel, a whore
Dark and doughty, black and lame
Flowing swift and aimless
You bring nothing save harm

But, you want to let go...
You want to rush off the edge…
You can see the horizon and I can feel the zenith…
It’s there, yeah…
Please… Drown, let it go... and change…

Why does your heart break every time…?
Oh why don’t you tame yourself…?
  Why oh river?... Why do you flow through me...?
Why? Why are you me?
God...


Sunday, August 1, 2010

The Perfect Hypocrite


hyp-o-crite /ˈhipəˌkrit/ :  If you don't walk the walk, it's probably best not to talk the talk.

The critical mind would be mystified by me, a fool when climacteric decisions are to be made. But, this isn’t about decisions or the fools; it’s about me or rather my own foolhardy world, a cocoon that I weaved for my own expiation. It’s a perfect synonymy, a harmonious embodiment. I expelled myself from the outside world, coercing myself to see with this new shade of color. And I saw bliss, I saw beauty, I saw contentment, an arcadian life, and I saw God. STOP! Because it wasn’t God I saw. Contrarily, I saw an illusion of him, an illusion I made up. For months I played around with this illusion. Talking with people, influencing them, and changing them; all through with my own private rustic world. And it was this dissemblance, this ‘lip service’ that brought many people to God, the real God. I hold my answers to them as true and legible; contemporary enough for the modern world (as I never held down any fast orthodox principles). And I was good at it, good at being an act. Acting all through, always, whenever I was with anyone, never showing my true self. And they believed, the nits!

Monday, March 29, 2010

Behold, I Make All Things Anew!


Inspired by SONICFLOOd & a rare song titled "Precious Jesus" by The Choir & Leigh Nash...



I remember you...
On that most holy night...
When heavens opened up, love poured out...
Hope kissed the earth, giving to us a gift…
Angels fell down to their knees…
And sang glory to your name!

I remember you…
When you slept in your Mother’s arms….
‘Twas a precious sight…
Little did people know, a stir was brewing...
One that would change the world forever...
For you came to set us free!

We remember you…
When you cried to the lost…
Ancient promises fulfilled…
So those who believe be salvaged...
Lover of our souls, you did everything…
But we spat on you… Lord… I spat on you!

We remember you…
When you stumbled and crawled…
Crown of thorns crushed down your skull...
You bled... Lord... You bled...
Bled for us... Oh Immortal, how you wept...
Calvary opened its dolorous gates…
But you loved us… You forgave!

I remember you…
On that holy cross… When you thirsted…
When I had nothing to offer…
When you cried out to your Father…
When you breathed your last…
The sun stopped... The earth shook in anger… That torn veil…
Oh my God… What have I done!

I remember you, Precious Jesus…
On that third day…
When the Angel broke through ranks of roman soldiers…
Slewing them that stood guard at your sacred tomb…
Oh, how dare they…
How dare they disgrace your holiness!

I remember you, Oh Prince!
When Sharon's Rose blossomed…
When Nature quaked, trembling with joy….
The skies thundered…
Sweet music echoed all around…
You conquered death… my Savior… You rose!

Oh I remember…
When the righteous dead couldn’t contain themselves,
They shouted, they screamed, they awoke!
The air around resounded…
'Twas the sound of the redeemed rising up to sing praises…
I sang with them, Lord… I sang… I shouted!

Now…
It’s my time to dream…
To dream of the sky…
The sky that faced the earth...
The earth where Love first cried!

Hey!
Can’t you feel the spirit in the air?
Rejoice, for his last words were “I come again”…
And you know he is coming…
Look around you…
It’s screaming in your face…
Remember!


Monday, December 7, 2009

The Enigmatic Conundrum



Back in my days in Kuwait, people never called me a nerd. They called me a genius. The subtle difference is that the latter never studies. The answers come to him, just at the cost of time. Probably it was a tactic developed by my lazy brain which didn’t want to bother going through the details, just the hard hitting facts. Many erratic grades of mine were due to me not having enough time to think. Hence I hated timed exams, and these deterred me to push with the flow. I had to use techniques that wasted brain on cramming. No logic, No basis, No footing. The education system screwed me over. And as you would know, the proficiency that got me through the toughest exams became obsolete, I forgot how it worked. Hence my serious academic career began with my stupidity, followed by falls. Then, I landed in NITT...